“It is finished…”

(Thanks, JS, for giving me the extra push to type this entry!)

SO, IT’S FINALLY GONE DOWN. My time at the job I’ve held down since my starting in January of 2008 has finally run out.  As of this past Tuesday, April 21st, the giant axe that was patiently sitting on a slowly unravelling piece of rope since late-February raised high and swung down swiftly on top of what was left – a fairly clean break I must say.  I mean, nobody died and things didn’t blow up and break lines weren’t cut or anything like that – it was quite the cordial firing session.  True, I was given a PIP (Performance Improvement Plan, for those not familiar w/ the term), or a PIPBoy as it was humorously called by one of my close colleagues (a nice play on the item of the same name in Fallout 3), two weeks prior to the axe-swinging date, but really, something like this was coming from a mile away.  If you were me, you would’ve seen the red flags long before anything official was written up.

The biggest indicators that they were going to finally move forward and begin sharpening the blade for its fated use was in the body language given off by both HR peoples and immediate managers alike.  Trust me, folks, take at least a year of Psychology while in college, if not minor in it – you’d be surprised just how damned useful it is for a variety of areas, the business world included!  For those that read my blog (and especially for that one special, special person who’s been following this blog for more slanderous purposes at work – I know who you are), I will give you some advice: try not to act like I’m a walking target whenever you see me and continue acting the way you normally do – such changes in the way you behave are quite noticable; such character changes are even more apparent since I’ve seen some of you totally let loose outside of work.  So in the future, just be yourself (or try MUCH harder) when you’re actively working with and around people you know are gonna be fired or laid off.

How the whole thing went down is, I must conclude, very douche-baggian.  I say that because I ended up working for pretty much the entire day, only to be pulled into the conference room at 5:25pm to be notified of my being chopped.  From what I understand, based on my talks with a number of people (my parents included), most companies drop people in the morning, I suppose to make it clear that their time with the company is done and that you better start packing your shit before 9am, lest you want it sprawled all over the pavement in front of the building.  Plus, getting chopped in the morning can be viewed as a great blow to personal morale and character, being that your co-workers would inevitably witness the packing process and you being escorted out.  A lesson would be learned and you’d go to your next job making sure you don’t make the same mistakes twice.  However, what is there to learn from working all fucking day, thoughts of what was discussed diminishing by the hour as nothing that is to be expected happens, thus giving you reason to keep on working… only to be pulled into a conference room at 5:25pm to get canned? IMO, the one thing this generates for the majority, on top of feeling guilty for actually getting fired, is a degree of hatred for the company and possibly its managers.  If I were to be fired or laid off, I’d want to be told by 8:30am, if not when I walk into the office – at least then I can hang my head in shame around my co-workers as I pack what I can into my messenger bag and be on my way to think about what went wrong.  Get fired in the afternoon, and the first thing on one’s mind upon leaving the presence of your escort (in my case, the manager I immediately worked under) is “WTF?! Sons-a-bitches had me do all that fucking work all day, only to can me in the end?!  Motherfuckers!!!”

I will say that I did initally feel bad about it, especially since I respect (and still do) the manager I worked under – he was friggen awesome.  His management style and his methods to instill discipline into his peers were rivaled by few, and I say that because I’ve seen my teammates in action – they knew their shit and could get quite granular when discussing the more detailed, technical portions of the product we sold.  And on top of that, team cohesion was very strong, with lots of communication b/w us and our manager, as well as comm b/w each other.  And when Wendy walked in (and the other managers left the conference room), I also felt bad – not because of the fact that I was being fired, but because I would be leaving behind everyone that I’ve befriended and spent a good amount of time with outside the office.  It is definitely true that a few of those that I’ve gotten to know at work I will still be speaking with and meeting beyond this point, but like middle and high school, and college, there will always be a percentage of those that I simply will lose touch with.  Of course, Facebook and sites like that will make it harder to truly lose all contact w/ people, but who knows what’ll happen.  The point is, I wouldn’t be seeing them on a daily basis again, which sucks big-time.  And Wendy (along with many others) is someone I definitely hope to continue speaking with outside of work, especially since she’s a gamer.  And as I’ve mentioned to her before (putting on my geek cap now…), us gamers must stick together and keep on fighting! =)

It’s been a wild ride, but now a new chapter begins, and where that’ll take me I don’t quite know.  But rest-assured, this blog will go on!  What does THAT mean for its future – and how it’s tied to mine?  You have three guesses, but you should be able to nail it in two…

Good night, fellow readers.  And for that special reader whom I directed a sentence or two: You have a good night, too.  And next time I’m in the general facinity of your job, don’t shoot me daggers from your eyes – it’s quite amusing, especially since all I want is to spend some good times with the friends I made.  During their lunch breaks. =)